The end of televised realtiy dating - rendering romance little more than a spectator sport - is no loss is it?

Production has stopped on NBC Universal Domestic Television Distribution’s Blind Date, while Warner Bros. Domestic Television Distribution’s ElimiDate hasn’t been renewed for 2006-07, sources said.

…

Blind Date and ElimiDate represent the last two relationship shows left in syndication. The past few years have marked the demise of such other dating shows as The 5th Wheel and Extreme Dating.

Blind Date production stopped, ElimiDate not renewed

In the interests of advancing public knowledge on this delicate subject, we have amassed a large stack of recent books, and have gone through them carefully for romantic tips on cultivating your own relationship. Sharing these books with one’s partner may require a certain amount of tact: You can only imagine the result of announcing, “Honey, I bought this book just for you: Intimacy for Dummies. ”

Let’s ‘Do It.’ Let’s buy a book!

All of which poses the question of how to flirt, score, start a loving relationship in an email without scaring the recipient or, alternatively, coming across as so cold as to be almost pathologically uninterested in other human beings. I frequently find new and exciting ways to make a fool of myself, especially concerning boys, and preserving such moments in written form is one of my favourite ways to do so. This flirtatious email etiquette guide is based on my own sorry experiences, with help from some equally inept friends.

I feel for Joe the email flirt

If their top-rated suggestion does not have the desired effect, then try in one of six languages to say: “Didn’t it hurt when you fell from heaven?”

Or maybe: “You must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all day.”

Scraping in at Number 10 in the romance parade comes “The only things your eyes haven’t told me is your name.”

Top 10 pick-up lines? Don’t get too excited.

Answer - just about everything. Just because you’re on an online dating site does not mean you have to throw every ounce of class out the window. We see men in particular get it all wrong every day. Acting badly in chat rooms, bad taste photos in their ads. Bad descriptions in their ads. Contacting members when they don’t fit the profile requirements. The list goes on - the fact is guys will not get the best results unless they learn how to play the online game. This means using some basic skills most of should know from functioning in society on a daily basis.

Respect for the opposite sex is paramount here, do to others as you would have them do to you. Girls are going to behave differently depending on what they are expecting so you have to take a good close look at the information they post in their profile and adjust your approach. If a girl says she wants a one night stand or a three some then you can be a bit more risqué with your initial approach. If there is an indication that your prospect wants a relationship then you would be advised to start slowly or consider what your after and not start at all.

In effect women post profiles online and wait for the emails to come flooding in - that’s how it goes. Guys don’t get contacted at any where near the same rate so they need to consider that when they respond to an ad they like that they are one of many and are entering a very competitive situation. Many online advances will go straight into the trash can.

Get involved, contact some women and see how you go - online dating is a great way to make contact with compatible partners. Try some variation in your approach and stick to what works for you. Thousands of people are meeting every day online using chat rooms, webcam chat and email.

Do’s - Use your manners - Ask intelligent questions - Look at and respond to members profiles - Respond to ads where you meet the profile requirements - Give a little information about yourself and what your looking for - Use a good picture or series of pictures - Get a professional photo taken - Be patient - be genuine

Don’ts - Be rude - be short - use graphic sex shots - don’t rush - Don’t respond to ads outside of their asking requirements - Don’t appear to be desperate (even if you are) Don’t lie about your age or anything else!

“People will forgive sexual infidelity before they forgive financial infidelity,” says divorce financial specialist Akeela Davis.

And those who do end up forgiving a financial philanderer end up being labelled “sucker,” adds Gail Vaz-Oxlade, host of the TV show Til Debt Do US Part, which airs on Life Network.

Well, “sucker” is definitely written all over the forehead of this desperate caller to my TV show, Money Line.

“Linda, what I can I do?” pressed John, who explained his work takes him away from home for weeks on end, and his bride gets bored. He went on to explain, “so she applied for all these credit cards, went on a spending spree, maxed them all out and secretly kept it from me. But then collection agencies began to call.”

Worried his bride had sunk them into a bankruptcy spiral, John took out a line of credit against their home’s equity, and paid every sucker off. He also sat down with his wife and firmly explained she was never to do this again.

But, he had to go off to work again, leaving her on her own, and, lo and behold, she did do it again.

Financial infidelity is a leading cause of marriage breakups,

The average person would probably think that methamphetamine is a relatively new drug that appeared suddenly overnight. Actually, methamphetamine has been around since the early 1900’s and has had a quiet growing affect on the population as it rapidly spreads across the physical and socio-economic boundaries of America. Also know as meth, crystal, crank and speed, it is the backbone of Ritalin and the “club drugs” ecstasy, eve and cat. With the widespread sharing of recipes for manufacture over the internet, meth has an increasing grip on American culture.

Sterling Braswell, author of “American Meth: A History of the Methamphetamine Epidemic in America” (ISBN 0595380212) takes readers on a historic journey through the many incarnations of this now famous molecule, and the deep but little-known impact it has had on American life over the course of the last century. Housewives, heads of state, businessmen and poets alike have acquired a taste for the yellow, crystalline powder. Everyone from Hitler to President Kennedy and Elvis to Jack Kerouac indulged in one of its many forms, and its presence has been like an invisible hand, shaping events and preparing the foundation for a world wide epidemic.

Braswell’s life was dramatically altered by methamphetamine and his deeply personal story was the inspiration for writing “American Meth.” Searching for information with the hopes of understanding and documenting the destructive effects of methamphetamine on his addicted wife, Braswell discovered a serious lack of awareness regarding this subject. “I did an endless amount of research and interviews with medical professionals, law enforcement, and substance abuse counselors,” explains Braswell. “Realizing I had compiled an extraordinary amount of vital information on the subject, I decided to document this for others people as well.”

The physical and psychological effects of methamphetamine are enormous and irreversible. It’s incredibly addictive nature is devastating and almost immediately can destroy the user’s humanity, and that of the people touched by it. “American Meth,” is a personal and historical account of methamphetamine and is a must read for anyone concerned about the future of this shocking epidemic.

OneKeyAway.com of Redondo Beach and Emotional Wreck-ords of Hollywood are uniting to create a new brand of dating and entertainment experience, playfully known as “Datertainment”. At select OneKeyAway Mixers, Emotional Wreck-ords Label Artists will provide ice-breaking entertainment and “Wingman” services that will encourage guests to mingle with each other throughout the event. The companies will launch their first cross-promoted event on Thursday, July 13, 2006 from 7pm to 10pm and held at 14 Below in Santa Monica, California.

OneKeyAway “Datertainment” events allow guests to interact freely with others in a pressure-free environment with an opportunity to quickly discover similarities - or dissimilarities - in one another’s personalities.

Part psychology, part technology, OneKeyAway “Datertainment” mixers infuses live entertainment with daters using a hi-tech device, which measures a person’s compatability with that of another. The device serves as both an icebreaker as well as an amazingly effective matchmaking tool. Unlike online dating services, OneKeyAway participants get to meet face-to-face. One can choose who they would like to speak to and do so without time limits on conversation or other boundaries.

“We are excited to work with an independent label such as Emotional Wreck-ords.” says Edwin Duterte founder of OneKeyAway Mixers. “Emotional Wreck-ords’ artists take the humorous approach when writing songs. Most of their music centers around the young professional’s view of the singles experience. The shows add a funky, spicey connection between the audience and the performers. Just imagine singers walking around before and after their music sets encouraging people to talk. Then when they are on stage they actively push people to approach each other. It’s truly unique in the entertainment industry to infuse dating, relationships and live performances.”

Emotional Wreck-ord’s artist Chris Valenti says, “It’s fun to date and meet new people, but being single can also be grueling. I think we need to be able to smile at our good experiences and laugh at the frustrating ones. Navigating through the single life requires a good sense of humor. Our artists are excited to ‘hook-up’ people during our shows. This adds a new dimension to a song’s ‘Hook’.”

About OneKeyAway
Organized in August 2003 and launched in January 2004, OneKeyAway Mixers set up a cool and hip atmosphere for professionals who want to meet other professionals or diverse people with personalities complementary to their own in an interactive, pressure-free, and face-to-face environment. OneKeyAway Mixers hosts events in Los Angeles, San Francisco Bay Area, New York and Washington DC.

About Emotional Wreck-ords
Established in 2004, their artists are the spokespeople for the unlucky in love. If you’ve ever been frustrated by a relationship and you have a somewhat twisted, but healthy ability to laugh at yourself – and others, then Emotional Wreck-ords music is for you. A hopeful romantic with a sardonic sense of humor, featured artist Chris Valenti has the knack for using self-deprecation and vulnerability to write songs about the hazards and frustrations of love and attempted relationships.

Did you know that two out of five single people in the UK now use some kind of on line dating service? That’s 40% of all singles! Unfortunately, the percentage of these people who actually find a real romance as a direct result of their site memberships is very low - probably less than 10%.

Why is this? Well, it’s true that some sites are better than others; they have more traffic, they are better to navigate; they just ‘work’ whilst others just don’t. But what really matters is how you use a site when you actually sign-up to one. Take my word for it, unless you take the five simple steps that I’m about to outline, you may as well do something more productive with your time than join a singles site. What I’m about to say may sound obvious and rather simplistic, but you’d be surprised at how many people don’t bother doing the ‘obvious’. So here goes…

1. Create A Great Profile. This is the most important aspect of your dating site experience. Don’t just say ‘Nice guy seeks nice girl for trips to the cinema’ - how boring does that sound? Take the time to say something about yourself, your lifestyle, your interests and the type of person you’re hoping to meet. And remember to sound happy, upbeat, fun and confident; if you’re miserable about your recent breakup, then keep it to yourself! This isn’t the time for modesty; if you think you’re pretty darn attractive, then be sure to say so. And humour is a real ice-breaker - if you can make someone laugh, they’ll be more likely to want to contact you.

2. Always Upload A Photo. Even if you don’t have a very flattering one to hand, you should always post a pic with your profile. Remember, 95% of people on dating sites only search for other members who have bothered to provide a picture of themselves. You want to see what other potential partners look like so it stands to reason that other people will want to know what you look like too. If your photo isn’t recent or isn’t a great likeness of you, you can always say so in your profile.

3. Be Proactive. Don’t just join a site and expect other people to contact you. Make sure you regularly search the database for people with whom you might be compatible and when you find someone you like the look or sound of, write to them immediately and tell them why you think you might be a good fit.

4. Write Great Emails. OK, you’ve joined a dating site, you’ve searched for other members who fall within your specified categories, and you’ve been presented with a page of matching profiles. You’re eager to fire off a few emails…but what on earth do you say in them? Re-read the paragraph above about creating a great profile and apply the same rules to the first email that you send to another member. If it looks like you can’t be bothered to say much or that you’re sending the same one line message to several people, then they probably wont bother to reply. Tell that person a little about who you are and why you think you might both be compatible - respond directly to what you’ve read in that person’s profile - sound interested and interesting and you’ll get an email by return - sound boring and downbeat and you’ll just be ignored.

5. Check Back With The Site. There are two reasons why you should do this as often as possible. The most obvious one is to keep up to speed with who has joined since you last logged-on; that special someone might have signed-up since you last visited the site so don’t miss out. However, what most people don’t realise is that when you log-in to a dating site, your profile moves up the listings on the internal search engine which means that you are more likely to be spotted and subsequently contacted by other people. Don’t be a stranger to the site you’ve joined and I recommend that you visit the site at least once a day during the lifetime of your membership.

So there you have it - 5 easy ways to make your chosen dating site work for YOU. Have fun and happy hunting!

About the author: Jonathan White is the founder of http://www.CupidNights.com - a London only dating site and the most successful geo-targeted dating site in Europe. He also writes articles on the singles scene for both newspapers and magazines in the UK.

“What time do you want to go to my family’s house on Christmas Eve?” you ask your boyfriend of two months. You’re looking forward to introducing him to your relatives because you’ve been bragging to them that your relationship has been perfect so far.

That is, until you hear his response to your question.

“Oh,” he says, turning a little red. “I didn’t think we’d be spending the holidays together with each other’s families. You know, we’re just dating.”

“Oh, sure,” you say, “I knew that.”

You proceed to go home, shut off your cell phone, block him on your Instant Messenger buddy list, and write him a 5-page email explaining that he led you on to believe you were special, and that you need to break up with him now.

If you didn’t get that far yet, girls, then listen up. Let’s explore what the phrase “just dating means”, apply it to your relationship, and plan what to do to move from “just dating” to “couple” status IF your guy is worth it. So, how do you know if he’s worth it?

You see, there is a “Type A” sort of guy, and there is a “Type B”. Simply put, one isn’t worth it, and the other has potential. As a female in search of a solid, healthy relationship, you must be able to distinguish between the two.

Let’s begin with “Type A”. This one is a real charmer. He can either be shy or outspoken, but certain characteristics definitely set Type A apart from the rest. Believe me, you’ll know if you’re dating Type A. He frequently breaks plans with you at the last moment. Type A will not make a habit of picking you up at your house for a date - you’ll usually have to meet him somewhere. When he does pick you up, he’ll oftentimes drop you off early so he can do something else - such as go out with his friends. His friends will usually even be around on your dates. Type A tends to be selfish, materialistic, and perpetually unsatisfied with everything and everyone he comes across.

The word “commitment” terrifies Type A. Type A claims to be either too young or not at the point in his life to be prepared for a relationship. He wants to “see what is out there before settling down”. He expects you to date him, while at the same time understanding his need to be with other women. Type A checks out potential dates while you’re standing right next to him.

“I think you’re a nice enough person for me to hang around with”, Type A is thinking, “But I know someone even nicer is bound to come along.”

Listen up, girls. Type A is irresistible to you because he has made himself unattainable. Of course you want him. You always want what you can’t have, and he knows it. He loves it. He thrives on it. But no matter how you try to sugarcoat, justify, or argue it - to Type A the phrase “just dating” means exactly how it sounds: no strings attached, no commitment, no relationship.

You are not going to change Type A’s mind. You are never going to be his girlfriend. Accept it. Give up. Forget him. Move on. More often than not, Type A will appear at your door 5 years down the road, when he realizes that he blew a good thing. And more often than not, you will slam the door in his face.

But don’t despair. You may just have yourself a “Type B” instead.

Unlike Type A, Type B tends to have had long-term relationships in the past. This is a good sign, signaling that he doesn’t have a phobia of commitment. However, he may have been hurt deeply by a past long-term sweetheart. He is usually someone who has a good relationship with his family; perhaps he’s a bit of a Mama’s Boy. He goes out of his way to help little old women cross the street. You are attracted to his kindness of heart, and this is what makes him irresistible to you. And unlike Type A, he will pick you up for a date, and perhaps even bring you flowers. He shows respect for you. He tends to be smart and analytical, looking at a decision from all angles before making it. He claims not to want to hurt you by jumping into a relationship too fast. So he tells you that perhaps you should “just date” for now. You take this as an insult, a blow-off line, an easy way out.

But STOP! Turn that phone back on. Put his screen name back on your buddy list. Mr. “Type B” is in the process of making his decision, girls. And he’s not taking it lightly. I know, when you are infatuated with someone it is not easy to be patient. But Type B may be worth the wait. Remember, familiarity breeds comfort. Let Type B get used to you. Let him want to be with you, and you alone. Let him make the moves. Let him come to you when he is ready. DO NOT pursue or chase him DO NOT get impatient with him, and throw fits of rage about how you don’t understand him. You see, he is weeding out exactly that type of girl - the type that doesn’t understand him. You will be irresistible to him simply by having a wonderful attitude, a huge smile, and the desire to show him that you want to get to know him as a person. Be his friend above all, because that is the foundation of any good relationship. So this Christmas you may not be sitting at his family’s table. But next Christmas he may be giving you a wedding ring. More often than not, Type B’s live on the same side of the door with us 5 years down the road.

About the author: Jill Dellamalva writes for Singles Dating 247.com - If you are single and looking for love then this is the site for you. Articles, Reviews and Links to the best sites on the Internet and the DrDating Forum - a forum for people looking for help in love, relationships and dating.

The journey to healthy online dating, intimate, social and personal relationships starts at the beginning of the rainbow. Experiencing the joy of childbirth is analogous to viewing a beautiful rainbow. Many women love being pregnant! They feel sexy and sensual, busty and beautiful. Furthermore, every time they gaze upon their expanding bellies they must realize part two of this phenomenal and splendid act is about to commence.

Manipulated by tradition, we believe there is no other means to an end other than the way of those who went before us. Fraud, manipulation, and deception have led us to believe that it is appropriate behavior to expose our children to fairy tales. We also accepted the belief that fairy tales are morality tales that will strengthen the moral disposition of our children. This statement is far from the truth, as children around the world who are exposed to fairy tales grow-up trying to unravel the complexities in their lives caused by being trapped in the fairy tale syndrome.

Our Fantasies Begin to Dominate Our Minds; Our Desires Dominate Reason; We begin to See Life; As We Desire Life to Be.

Fairy tales and fictional characters harbor illusions in our minds, constantly generating a false sense of reality. We begin to believe what we imagine to be real, loosing all perspective of reality. If we fail to focus on the moment (reality), we may experience severe agony in the future. We are always concentrating on imaginary future events as the present moment and its life giving lessons pass us by. We find our dating relationships crumbling to pieces and we do not know why. We wake-up in a state of dizziness; our dating relationships resemble the workings of a revolving door, everyone is jumping on and off and it seems like life is spinning out of control.

Our fantasies begin to dominate our minds; our desires dominate reason; we begin to see life, as we desire life to be. We begin to fantasize about the type of intimate relationships we are going to have even taking it to the extent of perceiving how we are going to act within the relationships. We create images in our minds, fantasizing about our knight in shining armor, or a Britney Spears look alike, or just the girl next door. We begin to fantasize about all sorts of things. It is similar to parachute jumping without a parachute. It is an enormous mistake because every action has a reaction. Not knowing what the next moment will bring, places us in an unprotected state.

When our fantasies fail to turn into reality, intoxicants seems to be an alternative. Our relationships with others turn sour and we turn on our best friends (even our imaginary ones). Fear increases, as well as our imaginary fears about future events that will never happen. Life for many becomes fragmented and unpleasant. We begin to experience a feeling of hopelessness, worthlessness, and pessimism. The aforementioned is the reaction to focusing on our desires (fantasies) instead of reality.

“In United States 44.3 million people, 18 and older—about 1 in 5 adults, suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder”

According to the National Institute of Mental Health,” mental disorders are common in the United States and internationally. An estimated 22.1 percent of Americans ages 18 and older—about 1 in 5 adults—suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder in a given year. When applied to the 1998 U.S. Census residential population estimate, this figure translates to 44.3 million people. In addition, 4 of the 10 leading causes of disability in the U.S. and other developed countries are mental disorders—major depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Many people suffer from more than one mental disorder at a given time.” There is no surprise.

As the rainbow appears to fade away, the beautiful picture is no longer clear. What is now apparent is reality. Reality is tolerable when we accept it. Reality only becomes unbearable when we refuse to accept it. For those who are planning to experience that beautiful rainbow on the horizon, remember that universal statement “I want to give my son or daughter those things I never had”.

We must give our children the opportunity to experience healthy dating relationships and embrace reality by encouraging them to focus and live in the moment. Denied were many the opportunities to learn the truth about the harmful effects of fairy tales, fiction, and desires. Countless dating relationships and marriages have ended as nightmares because of a universal misconception, that is, children grow out of everything. Children do not grow out of anything (except clothing) and they just grow into other things. Fairy tales, fantasies, and fiction are vehicles that cause our children to experience gross disappointments in life and destroy any hope of a healthy dating relationship. We must ask ourselves the question; do we want to foster disappointments and blameworthy characteristics in our children? Let us build healthy online dating relationships together. Stay tuned!

About the author: Naim is your host at http://www.singleskaters.com/home.htm. Our Online Dating Articles will reveal the truth, myths, illusions and deceptive activities. Naim A Samad is also the author of “Don’t Leave Home Without It”. The newly release book is the author’s field leveling, investigative masterpiece that arms readers with an information arsenal designed to help them avoid all forms of manipulation”

Quitting smoking is considered to be one of the most difficult things to achieve. Many people try to give up a few times before succeeding completely. Smokers generally have both physical and psychological dependencies on cigarettes. The physical attribute can be related to the nicotine cravings that many people have when they have not had a cigarette for a certain period of time. This amount of time differs between various people and how much they smoke. The psychological part can have many influences such as peer pressure or simply the enjoyment of lighting up.

If you are thinking about quitting the habit but still have some doubts in your mind then it may be worth considering the effects of smoking cigarettes. Smokers face a greatly increased risk of heart disease, and cancers of lungs, mouth, throat, stomach and pancreas. About half of smokers die of the habit. As well as all of this smoking causes bad smell of clothes and breath and the yellowing of teeth and nails. Smoking is also one of the leading causes of the early aging of skin. Smokers often claim cigarettes causes their nerves to calm down. In fact the exact opposite is true and smokers generally tend to be more nervous.

It is never too late to quit smoking as the health benefits are immediate. The best thing to do is to give up smoking entirely. However this is not the easiest method. Some people prefer to cut down on the number of cigarettes and then to give up completely. If this is the case then should have a written plan on how you are going to cut down. If you do decide to quit the habit, then you must be aware that it requires strong will and patience. You must be prepared to face a new challenge and a change of lifestyle. However look back at all the associated health benefits and the costs associated with smoking and you will immediately be put at ease. Make sure to choose a right time frame of giving up. If you decide to give up during a difficult period of life then in turn giving up smoking may also be more difficult.

There are a few steps that must be taken before quitting completely. On day of giving up you must make sure that you do not have any cigarettes lying around. The temptation of having a single cigarette is enough to make you want give up ‘giving up’. It is also worth staying away from any friends or colleagues who are smokers for a short while. The fact that you see them enjoying a smoke and the breathing in of their second hand smoke may be enough to make you give in.

Many people enjoying smoking at the same time as having an alcoholic drink. If you are such a person then steer clear of any bars or drinks for the first few weeks. Find a different way to socialize or a different activity to keep you preoccupied. Remember quitting smoking is a change of lifestyle and it can also be a great opportunity to get involved in sports and exercise. Combining a healthy diet and moderate exercise levels to start off with, help with the faster restoration of the body to a healthier state and ease the tension from not smoking.

If you find the cravings too difficult then it is worth having a pack of chewing gum ready. Chewing gum does not ease the cravings; however it does slightly reduce the stress of not having a cigarette. It is also a convenient substitute for the habit. Other alternatives include using nicotine patches for those with more cravings.

The first few days are always the most difficult. After the first week you will suddenly feel much more energetic than usual. People may have symptoms ranging from breathing difficulty in the mornings to sudden mood swings. However this is normal and after a few months, you will start to think why you had not given up smoking earlier!

About the author: For more great information on smoking and how to quit visit http://for-more-info.com/smoking/starting-smoking.html

Once you are good at meeting women online, or anywhere for that matter… The next step is to be able to qualify the lady quickly. By qualify I mean to decide whether to see her again and allow her into your life. This is a very important skill for many reasons.

Here is the Killer mistake a lot of men make!

They spend too much time with a woman they should have “disqualified” 20 minutes after they met her. Mainly because they’re glad to meet any woman who shows an interest in them.

What’s the best way to avoid the pain and hassle of a bad partner?

To be able to disqualify a future partner! Not easy I know.

See, the men that are good with women, don’t waste their time and energy on someone they instinctively know is going to be trouble. These guys have good qualifying skills, being able to move on quickly from un-responsive or unsuitable women. Then spending their time with only highly qualified dates. This is ‘effective time management’ for producing the best results!

So how do you qualify you ask?

Mmmmhhh, good question and a skill not practiced by many.

Let’s look at it and give an example.

What men good with women do is to have clearly defined criteria and as soon as they identify a trait that is outside of their criteria, they politely discontinue interest and move on.

You need to know what your desired outcome is,

Whether it is finding one lady for a permanent one on one committed relationship. Or you may want adventure and good times without too much commitment. If you don’t decide your desired outcome, you can’t define your ideal dating partner. Once you do know your outcome, however, the next step is to define the criteria of the “ideal dating partner.”

Once you have that criteria defined, you want to as Quickly as possible find out if a woman fits that criteria. If she doesn’t, then you need to spend your time identifying those who do. This is where most men make the ‘Killer mistake.’

They stick with a woman they should “disqualify,” hoping she’ll develop the traits they’re looking for. If she doesn’t fit your criteria, decide and move on quickly. Then spend your valuable time and energy finding one who does.

Heres a common example. If you’re looking to be married, and you’re dating a woman who says, “I just want to have some fun and meet people, and if it goes further, we’ll see what happens,” then you need to disqualify her. She’s looking for fun and adventure, not marriage, so she’ll be hard work to change to the traits you are looking for. And waste your valuable time…

Fair enough? So you’ll need to find and spend time with the type of women that suits your criteria. Write your criteria down and look at it BEFORE you send kisses, winks and emails at online dating sites.

If you just want to date and meet as many women as possible, which I did when I first went online to get experience, Your criteria can be small. However this Gets frustrating and disappointing as you are not spending quality time with quality women. Then a Year has gone by and you’ve had a lot of fun, but still not a really special, high quality woman in your life, that I’m sure you desire…

So the key to avoid the ‘killer mistake’ with online dating or any dating, is to define what YOU WANT. Then put as much time and energy as you can with women who fit that criteria, quickly moving on from women who don’t. As hard and harsh as that may be, your success with women will be a direct result of how you manage your time! This will lead you to finding the type of woman who you want and look forward to spending time with.

This leads to a feeling of well being, success and contentment.

Good luck, I hope you’ve got value from this article.

Regards Mick Jones

About the author:

Mick has cut his teeth on the front line of the dating battlefields. After many wounds and scars, he now has consistent success! You can too, to sign up to this newsletter, subscribe box is on our home page at; http://www.howtomeetwomenontheinternet.com Mail to; editor@howtomeetwomenontheinternet.com Wren Crescent, Buderim, Queensland, 4556, Australia.

Author: Susan Dunn, M.A., The EQ Coach™

It strikes terror in the heart of some of us, while others ignore it completely. Some of us are relieved there is one; others of us resent it. The Dress Code: Does it affect your career, affect whether you’re hired or not, affect how you’re treated on the job? Definitely.

How do you ‘manage’ this particular area of your life? It requires emotional intelligence – some awareness, creativity, flexibility and intuition, and a whole lot of common sense.

For instance, in former years I applied for a job at a major international law firm. At the interview, we were handed one sheet of instructions. The second item they chose to put on this piece of paper was, “Since you have chosen to work in a conservative work environment…”

It went on to outline their strict dress code. Two of us were hired. The other one later complained to me about the dress code there. I maintain - she knew when she signed up, she agreed to it, she had no leg to stand on. If you like to work out certain, um, conflicts in your life via the dress code, that’s your choice. Otherwise, here are some tips.

THE POLICY

Believe what you read. Part of EQ is reality-testing. If you’re a free spirit who likes to express herself through wardrobe and accessories, don’t work for a conservative law firm. Being provocative is not emotionally intelligent.

THE REALITY

There’s the P&P manual, and then there’s what really goes on. They don’t always coincide. Once you’re hired and working, EQ would suggest that you observe those around you and fit in. “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.”

THE BASICS

·Start with neat and clean. No rumples, stains, frayed edges, hanging hemlines. Your clothes should look and smell clean and tidy. ·Make sure your clothes fit. ·Go easy on trends. A zebra-striped accent is okay. A total zebra look …save it for a social occasion. ·Watch “heaviness”. Don’t load yourself down with big jewelry or weighty fabrics. ·Watch what you do around your face. You should ‘set your face off,’ not outshine it. ·Aim for a smooth look – no underwear lines, for instance. ·Get the classics. The Little Black Dress really can get you everywhere – wear the right ‘tone’ of jewelry depending on your skin tone – pearls, gold, silver, it makes all the difference. Experiment. Black slacks and a white blouse (ivory, if you look sick in white, like I do) can take you anywhere. ·De-clutter. Less is more. ·Look at yourself in the mirror and see what you see. If you’re applying for work at a business or corporation, err on the side of conservatism. If you work in an artistic field, you will, of course, have latitude. You likewise have some latitude if you’re really good in a highly competitive filed. Though I might not go so far as my young friend and computer genius with the 4.0, who told me, “I could show up for an interview with a bone in my nose and they’d hired me.”

CASUAL DAY

Often a nightmare for managers. Have you seen that memo circulating the Internet that starts out “Starting May 1 we will have Casual Day on Fridays”, proceeds through ”dashikis, turbans, bikinis, and gold lame jumpsuits are not…” and ends with “Casual Day has been canceled.”

Some companies use phrases like “client dress code” and “meeting dress code” to help the good-taste-challenged. If they don’t, use your common sense, quintessential EQ. If there’s a big meeting, or clients coming to the office, dress accordingly.

WHAT’S IN & WHAT’S OUT

The other day a friend of mine (we live in TX) was heading for the D. C. area and asked for my advice re: wardrobe. I told her no florals, no bright colors…” She interrupted with “How do YOU know?” Well, because I get around. I look around. I care.

My family moved every 2-3 years when I was growing up and in the summers I went to my grandmother’s in a rural Texas town. I got tired of being made fun, so I learned to learn quick. “Being made fun of” in the adult world can mean missing promotions, or being fired.

SO HOW TO FIND OUT MORE? ·People-watch. When you see someone well put-together, who looks really good, analyze why. Color? Fabric? Accessories or lack of them? ·People-ask. I can’t think of anything more flattering than to be asked how I manage to look so good. Ask and you can learn theory. One thing you’ll likely pick up, a la EQ, is that the person delights in dressing as they do. They’re having fun. They’re creative. Then remember, “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.” ·Read magazines. Find some middle-of-the road magazine, something down-to-earth. Try “Marie Claire.” It’s a bit pricey but you can apply what you learn in a resale shop. FOR INSTANCE: They have “The Best Jeans to Flatter Your Shape.” “Great-fitting jeans are the ultimate wardrobe essential—and the hardest to find,” they say. I agree. The editors’ pick for all figures happens to be $138, but I’d pay that just to see if they actually flattered me: http://magazines.ivillage.com/marieclaire . ·Watch tv shows with fashion in mind. Anchor people are good, too. ·Use the Internet. ·Watch who compliments you. One time I had on something I will not describe to you, and a teenaged boy with purple spikey hair and 5 earrings brushed past me in the store and said, “Like, dude, cool outfit.” It went in the trash. What was I thinking? ·Work with a coach.

Like everything else, dressing appropriately and attractively can be learned, and it can make a difference in your life. The greatest accessory you can have is self-assurance. If you do your homework, you’ll know you look right, and then you’ll feel right. Personal Power!

About the author: ©Susan Dunn, M.A., Clinical Psychology, The EQ Coach. Executive and individual coaching, EQ-culture programs for organizations, Internet courses on emotional intelligence. http://www.susandunn.cc , and mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for FREE ezine, “EQ in the Workplace.” Please put “EQ” for subject line. Increase your EQ and everyone benefits.

Few things are more difficult than kicking bad habits or developing more positive ones. But it is definitely worth the effort. Bad habits like smoking, overeating or self-criticism shorten lives and lead to underachievement, and unsuccessful attempts to change them lower self-esteem.

In contrast, good habits create a kind of “success auto-pilot,” leading to greater accomplishment with less thought and less effort.

1. Replace a bad habit with a good one. Completely eliminating a habit is much harder than replacing it with a more productive habit. Studies of people who compulsively bite their fingernails have shown that it is very difficult for them to completely give up their habit, and much easier for them to substitute biting with the more productive habit of grooming their nails.

Similarly, people who talk too much during meetings struggle to become silent, but find it much easier to replace their compulsive talking with highly attentive listening.

2. Exercise. A habit of regular exercise is obviously important for lasting weight loss. But you may not realize that exercise helps in accomplishing a variety of goals, and in eliminating a number of bad habits.

Frequent exercise helps break habits of overeating, and in kicking all kinds of addictions, particularly if exercise is substituted for an end-of-the-day cocktail or cigarette. Among smokers who become competitive runners, for example, over 80% give up smoking.

3. Reward success. The most fundamental law in all of psychology is the “law of effect.” It simply states that actions followed by rewards are strengthened and likely to recur. Unfortunately, studies show that people rarely use this technique when trying to change personal habits. Dieters, for example, routinely overlook weeks of exercise and restrained eating, only to let a single lapse “snowball” into a total relapse and complete collapse.

Setting up formal or informal rewards for success greatly increases your chances of transforming bad habits into good ones, and is far more effective than punishing yourself for bad habits or setbacks.

4. Schedule your bad habits. If you are really struggling to kick a bad habit, try limiting the habit to a specific time and place. If you are struggling to quit cigarettes, allow yourself to smoke from 9-9:30pm, and only in an uncomfortable “smoking stool.” When the urge to smoke strikes, tell yourself that you’ll have plenty of time to smoke during your pre-scheduled smoking period. Research and case studies confirm that this rather unconventional approach can be a useful first step in changing bad habits.

Copyright © 2004 Stephen Kraus, Ph.D.

REFERENCES

The findings and recommendations in this article are based on scientific research published in peer-reviewed journals. For complete references, see Psychological Foundations of Success: A Harvard-Trained Scientist Separates the Science of Success from Self-Help Snake Oil by Stephen Kraus, Ph.D.

About the author: Success Scientist Dr. Stephen Kraus is author of Psychological Foundations of Success: A Harvard-Trained Scientist Separates the Science of Success from Self-Help Snake Oil. He was recently featured in Conversations on Success, along with Brian Tracy and Wally “Famous” Amos. Steve has a Ph.D. in psychology from Harvard University. To contact him or subscribe to his REAL Science of Success ezine, please visit http://www.RealScienceOfSuccess.com